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Monday, May 10, 2010


Few things are likely to set me off more than, "But it's tradition! We have to do it that way!" Hogwash. Traditions are only traditions because somebody did it once and then someone suggested that it should happen that way again. Voila - tradition is born. Hell, I've seen enough of them born in my short 35 years on Earth to know that traditions can be a good thing, a bad thing, a burden, or something that you're willing to change.

My least favorite tradition in the world is that when the wedding guests clank on their glassware, the bride and groom are required to kiss, on demand. On a metaphorical basis alone, this is a TERRIBLE way to start out a marriage. You two, getting married on this day, are not bright enough to remember to show appropriate affection to one another, so we, your guests, shall be your judge, and force you to perform all day as the trained monkeys you are. Um... NO.

Now, this is a tradition that has gained popularity in my lifetime, and figures in the single worst wedding horror story I ever experienced, where the DJ had a glass clanking sound effect on a button on his sound board, and so when not a single wedding guest had a glass nor silverware in hand, the glass clinking started low and rose to a crescendo, in exactly the same pattern as the other dozen times we'd heard it that night. I shudder now at the thought.

So, be careful what you demand as tradition. I enjoyed this article, 6 Supposedly Ancient Traditions (That Totally Aren't), perhaps more than the average person.

That said, I'm off to Alameda Ceili for our third anniversary tonight where I expect to dance Fairy Reel to Night Fever, as befits our local tradition.


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